100 Questions About My Favorite Subject

1. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
Open...but it's because I have a TV with Nintendo (old school), PS2, and 3-disc CD changer in there...oh and a few clothes

2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?
Did you know that they sell similar sized shampoos & soaps from the Ritz-Carlton in those fancy stores for about $40 a pop? You'd be a fool not to at least take it home as a test sample.

3. Have you ever had sex in a hotel room?
Yes...tehehehehe (I have a family relative witness who was in the other bed in a wine-induced coma)

4. Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
Yes...but you can't prove anything. That speed limit sign was coming down anyway.

5. Do you like to use post-it notes?
I like to leave little messages for coworkers with them...like "Hey, you rock! Your buddy, Steve. P.S. Sorry about the love stains on the seat."

6. Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?
I don't cut out coupons...but I have kept some WAY past expiration date

7. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?
Wow....I'd say a big bear. You can put that on a tombstone. That's just a thing of mine. Since I guess I have to die eventually, I want it to be something that I won't be ashamed to put on a tombstone. Maybe with an accompanying picture chiseled into the granite. Like the bear, fierce & clad in battle armor (like Golden Compass or something), and me standing there naked with a a knife in one hand and my magic stick in the other. You know, something like that...that'll make people wonder, "Who the hell was this guy?"

8. Are you currently in love?
Not really. I love my family & friends...but not that hot, steamy, passionate stuff...but the day is young, who knows?

9. Do you always smile for pictures?
I am the least photogenic person on Earth. It's been proven. However, I will smile for pictures if given the opportunity. Everybody's hotter when they smile.

10. What is your biggest pet peeve?
When they crap on the carpet.

11. Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?
Tucked out? What exactly does that mean? I like to think I sleep with them tucked up.

12. Do you ever count your steps when you walk?
No...but it would definitely come in handy if I were ever stricken blind.

13. Have you ever peed in the woods?
When you're a man, the world is your urinal.

14. Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
There's always music playing in my head...and it's usually Kylie Minogue and her damn catchy ditties.

15. Do you chew your pens and pencils?
No. I don't have that whole oral fixation thing.

16. How many people have you slept with this week?
Week? Month? Year? Not as many as you would hope for a nice guy like me...

17. Do you like popcorn from those big tins?
Caramel popcorn kicks ass

18. What is your "song of the week"?
Hmm, don't really have one...maybe the "Whisper Song"

19. Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
Sure. I don't anticipate that I'll wear pink...but who knows?

20. Do you still watch cartoons?
I was up all night watching Adult Swim on Cartoon Network. Hell, ALL I watch is cartoons.

21. Whats your favorite scary movie?
The Hannibal Lechter movies

22. Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?
The Blue Lagoon

23. What do you drink with dinner?
Water or Mountain Dew usually

24. What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
Blue Cheese if possible...or ranch

25. What is your favorite food/ cuisine?
Pizza

26. What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
Big Lebowski, Scarface, Fight Club, Back to the Future, etc.

27. Last person you kissed/kissed you?
Technically, my niece Kairi

28. Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
I was. About the time I got to Webelos...that's when I decided it wasn't for me.

29. Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
Already have. There's a foldout.

30. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
Handwritten? Letter? That's not very professional (and I have horrible penmanship) so it must have been back in grade school...before computers were big.

31. Can you change the oil on a car?
Yes. It's one of the few things that I can do.

32. Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Probably a dozen...and I drive like a grandma. Never drive a red Camaro unless you like paying tickets for no reason.

33. Ran out of gas?
My Baby's gas meter is a little tricky. I've done it twice...but track my miles now.

34. Favorite kind of sandwich?
Chicken, bacon, blue cheese, maybe some crumbled fritos on some good whole wheat bread. Tell me that doesn't sound great.

35. Best thing to eat for breakfast?
Pancakes

36. What is your usual bedtime?
Usually a little after 1 AM

37. Are you lazy?
Yeah, I could do so much more...but I could also do a lot less.

38. When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for halloween?
A lot of silly stuff. For example, once I wore a clear plastic bag with mutli-colored balloons under it...and said I was a bag of jelly beans. "In the ghettooooo..."

40. How many languages can you speak?
Two, English & German. Ja, das ist richtig. Deutsch.

41. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
I used to get Sports Illustrated...but not any more. I'm thinking Maxim or FHM might be a good choice.

42. Which are better legos or lincoln logs?
Legos, of course. I'm offended by the question.

43. Are you stubborn?
Like a Fox...or an Ass I guess.

44. Who is better...Leno or Letterman?
Conan O'Brien

45. Ever watch soap operas?
Not really...but I love to check them out at work during a break once in a while...because it's the same stupid stuff as when I was forced to watch them when I was babysat by my aunt twenty-plus years ago...and everything is drawn out with that dramatic violin strum / slow camera zoom-in, then quick flash to something going on elsewhere in town that has been paused since a half-hour earlier in the show. Ridiculously horrible.

46. Afraid of heights?
Wouldn't it be weird if I were? You know, being really tall. No? I think it would be.

47. Sing in the car?
That's what a car is for, right? Isolation chamber so nobody else has to hear you sing.

48. Dance in the shower?
That gets dangerous after a certain point. Believe me, I have the scars to prove it.

49. Dance in the car?
Mostly head-bopping & slapping the steering wheel

50. Ever used a gun?
I grew up in cow country. I have used MANY guns...effectively.

51. Last thing you put in your mouth?
A spoon...with cereal attached.

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?
I thought that was the point...

53. Is christmas stressful?
If you let it be.

54. Ever eat a pirogi?
Enough to know it's spelled Pierogi. My aunt Sissy (who actually died two days ago) made the best Pierogies ever.

55. Favorite type of fruit pie?
Peach... :P

56. Occupations you wanted to have when you were a kid?
Professional Basketball Player, archeologist, billionaire, etc.

57. Do you believe in ghosts?
Not really...but I think it's possible...and my buddy Johnny swears to this day that he was sucker punched by a ghost (whose headstone Johnny had molested...literally, in a drunken trip into the west desert of Utah)

58. Ever have a feeling of deja-vu ?
All the time...but it's mostly because I think I see them in dreams...then they happen.

59. Take a vitamin daily?
Nope.

60. Wear slippers?
I have some nice lion head slippers that I trot around in during the winter...or when I'm loungin'

62. What do you wear to bed?
A smile usually

63. First concert?
Def Leppard...in the womb

64. Wal-Mart, Target or K-Mart?
Walmart

65. Nike or Adidas?
Converse

66.Cheetos Or Fritos?
Fritos...mmm Honey BarBQ

67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?
Yes, thank you

68. Ever hear of "gorp"?
No...but it sounds delicious

69. Ever take dance lessons?
Yes, I'm a very good ballroom dancer

70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?
Victoria's Secret supermodel

71. Can you curl your tongue?
Yes I can

72. Ever won a spelling bee?
All the time when I was a kid

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
All the time. It's a side effect of having my face reconfigured after a pretty bad car accident. Hmm, the 10 year anniversary is coming up really soon.

74. Own any record albums?
Like actual big 10-inch records? No...but I do have a few 8-tracks

75. Own a record player?
My dad does...but doesn't have records anymore.

76. Regularly burn incense?
Nope. My sense of smell is...less than satisfactory.

77. Ever been in love?
I like to think so...but probably not if I'm unsure about it, right?

78. Who would you like to see in concert?
Still alive? How about Isaac Hayes? Make that happen Amy Grant.

79. What was the last concert you saw?
Tech Nine!!!

81.Tea or coffee?
Green tea

82. Favorite kind of cookie?
Mmm, the kind that heats up the closer you get

85. Are you patient?
Extremely patient

86. DJ or band, at a wedding?
DJ

87. Ever won a contest?
Trip to Disneyland when I was a kid. Lots of academic BS in high school...but that's more competition than contest.

88. Ever have plastic surgery?
Just to put my face back together...and LASIK.

89. Which are better black or green olives?
Green

90.Can you knit or crochet?
Crochet? Isn't that the game with the balls and those hammers that's like golf only dumber?

91. Best room for a fireplace?
Living room or bedroom

92. Do you want to get married?
Eventually...but only if I meet the right girl. Or if I meet more than one, then I'd like to start a compound but not get married...because that's illegal.

94. Who was your HS crush?
Ann - I had a supercrush on her for a long time, asked her out to senior cottilion. She accepted. It was a pretty lame, awkward date. She didn't seem to like my style. The first time I got drunk, I wrote her a poem. It sucked if I remember correctly. I never sent it. Just threw it away. Oh well. At least I tried.

95. Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?
That's stupid. I punch and give figure-four leg locks until I get my way...or pull out the pimphand.

96. Do you have kids?
No.

97. Do you want kids?
I would like some eventually...but again, right woman first

98. What is your favorite color?
Blue

99. Do you miss anyone right now?
Yep

100. Who do you wanna see right now?
Adriana Lima...but I'm gonna go hang with my dad for the day and watch football. Have a great day, y'all!!!