Wherever God Takes Me

Good Evening Ladies & Gentlemen,

Last night, I did end up going to see "Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay" with my Wingman, his dad Buck (who was also in town), and his brother...we'll call him Iceman, why not? It was kind of a last minute thing...and they wanted to come along. The Wingman & I thoroughly enjoyed the movie...because we had seen the original and enjoyed its irreverent, racist, marijuana-inspired, risque comedy. I'm not sure that the other two did...but whatever...I didn't pay for 'em. By the way, there were only two other people in the theatre on the only showing of the day. So from that nationwide gross of about $2500 pulled by the movie this weekend...about 1% of that was us. You're welcome. Just trying to do our part. So yeah, if you liked the first Harold & Kumar, you'll like the second one. Basically, two stoners on a plane to Amsterdam are mistaken for terrorists and thrown in Guantanamo Bay...then escape & trek across the country to prove their innocence. There's racist jokes, unicorns, Doogie, a Cyclops, sandwiches, a stirring speech from W, fantasy sequences, a whorehouse ran by Beverly D'Angelo, character development, and of course...more Doogie. Check it out...or if its not your style, don't. By the way, I did get a call near the end of the movie (round midnight) and I sincerely thought that it was Vegas...but it was my mom...which is almost as weird because her bedtime is like eight o'clock. Don't worry, she just lost her cell phone charger and thought she might have left it at my house last week.

This morning, I really didn't do much...except watch "The Best of the Colbert Report" and before I knew it...three hours had passed. Now, you all know that I think Stephen Colbert is hilarious, charismatic, and egocentric...which I like to think that I am...correction, KNOW that I am. What's in the Best of the Colbert Report? His historic first show where he introduced the word "Truthiness" which was later added to Merriam-Webster's Dictionary, the great metaphor-off with Sean Penn, ice cream three-way with Jane Fonda & Gloria Steinem, highlights from his green screen challenge, his best in the 435-part series "Better Know a District", his numerous awards & dedications including the naming of a bridge, eagle, junior league hockey team, airliner, ice cream, and so much more. Truly a great American idol.

Why was I watching it for three hours besides its sheer entertainment value? It was rainy today...and I did go for a few walks in the rain as I love to do (going to really miss rain down in Vegas) but at times it got quite torrential. Really glad that it cooled off though (going to miss that too). Also, today I had a meeting at work where I found out my schedule in the usual two weeks notice...and I was really zoned out for most of it. Sure, Captain Monty kept me entertained with the horrible things coming out of his mouth, Camb was telling me about her wedding plans, JL Clyde was laughing at me for some reason (because I was laughing to myself about turning everything my boss said into some kind of sexual metaphor), and all of that...but I was a little distracted because I was expecting Vegas to call (it just would have been TOO convenient) and I was told that another one of my coworkers died this morning.

Penelope is her name...and she was seriously one of the sweetest ladies you could ever hope to meet. We had known each other for the full ten years that I've worked there (God, it's been too long) and unfortunately, her time just ran out. That's really all that I can say...and it sucks horribly...because she's a sweetheart...but at least she's at peace, I guess. My condolences to her family & all the blog readers out there that knew her...and also called her Pe-Ne-Lope (like Cantelope) just to get a smile out of her.

After the meeting, I went to my dad's to hang out for a few...and was surprised that my nephew Canon was there spending the night. Not sure if I'm mentioned him before...because it has actually been a while since I've seen him...but he's my stepsister's son (she's the same age as me) and he's six years old...and just one of the most energetic, yet well-behaved kids that you could ever hope for. Oh yeah, he's in my Christmas entry with pictures, that's right. We had good times playing with Lincoln Logs, wrasslin', having tickle fights (undefeated champion right here y'all), and just having fun. Sweet kid...and of course, he loves his Uncle $teve...because I'm f**king awesome.

While he & his grandma (my stepmom) went to Mickey D's for dinner, my dad & I watched "Escape From New York" starring Kurt Russell & Isaac Hayes. I hadn't seen this movie in a long, long time...but yeah, it's a classic about a future where New York is basically a hellhole, the President crashes there, and a cycloptic badass named Snake Pliskin (Russell) is sent in to get him back from the powerful underground boss, the Duke (Hayes). Good times. They made a sequel set in LA called...get this, "Escape from L.A." about twenty years later...but yeah, this one's pretty good. Check it out if you like 80's badass movies...and I know a few of you out there do (lookin' at you, Bone Junior...who probably has both on DVD). Anyway, then I came home after Canon went to bed.

Let's see...what's on the schedule for tomorrow...oh yeah, nothing. Still just waiting for Vegas to call & decide that they want me to run their business. Still going to pack up what I want to keep and pawn off the rest (couches, books, PS2, all for cheap if anybody's interested out there). My mom called inviting me to head to her house for the weekend while she's babysitting my niece & nephew...and hell, I just may do that if I don't hear anything...because then they'd never be able to get a cell phone signal to me in the Fortress of Solitude. That'll show 'em. Regardless of what I have planned...or really don't, I'm sure that I'll have fun not working. Have a great day everybody!!! RIP Penelope!!! Oh...and have fun in San Diego, Bubbles!!! You're gonna love it!!! Be sure to check out the pandas...and see if my videos are helping them any. Oh, it looks promising...