Work Party & Huka Reggae

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

As promised, here are some pictures from our work party at Hollywood Connection Wednesday night, courtesy of JL Clyde…but none of Laser Tag or the after party...because that's how we roll...like Vegas...

Mini Golf to start

Pictured are Brooklyn & Camb, with Lilie hiding

Captain Monty advertising for either

Polo shirts or Spiced Rum

Look at the crystal clear blue water...

but DO NOT let it touch your skin

The motorized clam was broken...but Alta's always helpful

Dinosaurs are always cool

ALTA!!! Don't feed the caged dinosaurs!!!

There's a reason they're caged!!!

The Mad Scientist plays & livesby his own rules...

which usually involve sarcasm, big sticks, & curry

"YAY!!! SKEE BALL!!!"

"Oh, it's broken..."

Captain Monty & me racing Quads

Boss Lady J prefers Hogs

"Ladies, that's not how you play"

"DIE YOU ZOMBIE NINJA SCUM!!! GET SOME!!! GET SOME!!!"

Air Hockey - Lilie vs. the Mad Scientist

It was a good, close game...but Science wins again!!!

The Imagination wanders...and the Pallet salivates

So yesterday, I just wasn't feeling it. The whole day at work, I was just going through the motions, updating my resume, and basically just doing what needed to be done…and that's it. Not my usual valiant effort to make everybody's day. I didn't know why. Figured it was just a little malaise from staying up until 2 AM driving home drunk people the night before and not getting to sleep until 3 AM or something. So what did I do to cheer myself up? Called Bubbles on the way home, got her voicemail, and left a cheery message along the lines of "HOLLA!!! HWHAAAT??? HWHAAAAAT??? YEEEEEEAAH!!! OKAAAAAY!!! Yeah, it's Cookie. Gimme a call. Bye." About twenty minutes later, I get a call back from her…and she said exhaustedly, "You knew that I was having a bad day, didn't you? You were probably feeling horrible all day too." I was caught off guard. "Yeah, pretty much. What's wrong? Are you okay?" "I'm in the ER because I was having migraines again & decided to find out what was going on. Your voicemail made my day. HOLLA!!! HWHAAAAAT???" "Well, I figured you could use some cheering up. I needed it too." "We just always seem connected that way, don't we?" It's true. I don't know if it's because she's a High Priestess or something…but we can usually sense when the other's having a bad day & we're always there to cheer them up…even if over the phone or something. It's weird…but hey, it works. Also, just so you know. She's doing better today & is back to work and everything. She's got some medication…and hopefully she won't have any more migraines.

After talking with Bubbles (and basically telling her to get some sleep & call me tomorrow), JL Clyde & I met up to head to the Huka Lounge to see Alisa's husband's band Slow Ride rock it out on a Thursday night. They did not disappoint. We got there right around 9 PM and we were already struggling to find a seat…but we did end up getting a couch…and a few Evolution Ales. About twenty minutes later, we met up with Alisa herself and caught up on all the new motherhood happenings & just relaxed to the soothing sounds of reggae. Her husband even dedicated a remake of one of my favorite songs of all time, Eric Clapton's "Wonderful Tonight" to her…and she obviously loved it. Great song.

This kind of led to a question posed by Alisa, "What're the songs that turn you on?" She went on to explain it more specifically as songs that you hear…and then simply have to have someone to dance with…or more. Apparently, this might be a girl thing…because those two ladies had answers off the bat…whereas my response was "I have songs that I associate with great moments and certain people and stuff like that…but honestly, ANY song that is, I don't know, sung to me by a lovely lady…will turn me on." I don't know. Anybody else have songs that send them into a sexual frenzy? It's not really a song for me. Just a word - Yes!!!

By 10 PM, the place was standing room only with the young, drunken, hooting college crowd. The Huka Lounge is a great place. I'd go back there in an instant…but not as the creepy guy in the corner…so if anybody's interested in Reggae Nights (apparently Thursdays according to the valet) or whatever, let me know. It's a few blocks from my house…but we have to be there early. When we were leaving around 11:30, there was just as many people standing outside as inside…on a Thursday night. Don't they have school in the morning? Anyway, good times…and big thanks to Alisa & JL Clyde for going with me. It was a lot of fun. Now for the news...

Charlie Tuna Filleted - An 8-foot Monterey Cypress sculpture of beloved canned fish figure Charlie Tuna stood near the South Slough Bridge in Charleston, Oregon. That is…before two men swiped it last month. "We had planned to wait a little while and then leave Charlie in a random place in town where he could be returned unharmed," they said in an apology letter published in The World of Coos Bay…but someone tipped off sheriff's deputies, who started nosing around. Santos and Terry rushed to their hiding place and tried to move Charlie but the statue wouldn't fit in their truck. "We decided to chop him up so we could move him," they said. "This was not pre-planned." Really? You think? Deputies caught them in the act and charged them with theft and criminal mischief. Apparently the statue was almost hollowed out by bugs over the years anyway (insert your favorite rotten tuna joke here) but still, I think maintenance lady Mel Campbell said it best saying, "This was just a terrible, dumb, stupid prank that went absolutely wrong." A wake is planned Saturday at the town's visitors center. The Wild Women of Charleston and the Tuna Guys will offer musical moments. The remains are to be burned and buried at the center. Mourners are invited to share stories about Charlie, and tuna recipes. Sorry, Charlie!!! May you end up in the Land of Good Taste & Incredible Freshness…

4th of July: Sex & Drugs Celebration - Also in Oregon, a woman seen frequently in Ashland riding topless on her bicycle says she plans to be in the city's Fourth of July parade free and independent of all clothing but a hemp G-string. The Chamber of Commerce says that's contrary to the rules for the family celebration. She says she'll sue if she can't parade as she wishes. Jen Moss has been known as "The Naked Lady" since she moved to Ashland in May from Ojai, California drawn by the town's nudity laws. They specify only that people must cover their genitalia in a city park or the downtown commercial district, which means Moss need not cover her breasts. She says the police in California harassed her when she rode her bicycle wearing a G-string and pasties. I'll bet they did. I've seen my fair share of "CHiPs" episodes. Ponch would've done it. Anyway, she applied for a parade entry, was approved, then the C of C learned of her plans on an online posting promising that she'd lead in-line skaters "wearing only a hemp G-string and blowing a conch shell." Parade Chairman James Kidd said, "She's welcome on any other day of the year to do that but not on the Fourth of July while in the parade." City Council member & nudity enthusiast Eric Navickas thinks that it would be "an interesting commentary on our society that we're willing to tolerate dead bodies through our aggressive foreign policy from the war, but not healthy, naked bodies." I'm intrigued as to who will win this debate. Jen Moss & her healthy naked body with puff-puff panties & blowing a conch shell…or Jimmy the Kidd and his family values? Only time will tell…and about two weeks. By the way, I'm not sure if the lady pictured is Jen Moss (in fact, I doubt it) but I frankly don't care. A man can dream...

Iron Curtain, Concrete Skies - Russian air force planes dropped a 25-kg (55-lb) sack of cement on a suburban Moscow home last week while seeding clouds to prevent rain from spoiling a holiday. "A pack of cement used in creating ... good weather in the capital region ... failed to pulverize completely at high altitude and fell on the roof of a house, making a hole about 80-100 cm (2.5-3 ft)," police in Naro-Fominsk told agency RIA-Novosti. You have to admire a police force that can use terms like "pulverize completely" in an official statement. Love it. June 12 was Russia Day, a patriotic holiday celebrating the country's independence after the break-up of the Soviet Union and ahead of major public holidays the Russian Air Force often dispatches up to 12 cargo planes carrying loads of silver iodide, liquid nitrogen and cement powder to seed clouds above Moscow and empty the skies of moisture. The homeowner was not injured, but refused an offer of 50,000 rubles ($2,100) from the air force, saying she would sue for damages and compensation for moral suffering. I anticipate that he will disappear by next week and the KGB and/or Russian Mafia will have nothing to do with it. Going along with yesterday's news of the Chinese UFO, keep your eyes to the skies over there in Asia. You never know what's happening up there.

Well, that'll do it for me for today. I'm officially applying for that other job in Vegas…so wish me luck. Tomorrow, I work again…so I'm sure that I'll have something clever to type down…or maybe not. You know me. I'm pretty consistent with this thing…because I have no life. (Deep sigh) Have a great weekend everybody!!! Get Smart comes out today. Go check it out.