It's a Good Thing I'm Charming

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Yesterday was an extremely lazy day…but it was good because I wasn't feeling too well. I also got a lot of belated birthday wishes from the Wingmans, Camb, Brooklyn, and basically everybody else who I didn't hang out with on Saturday. I basically watched a LOT of NBA playoff basketball and some pretty good games…but the best & worst part came midday. I was texting Bubbles, who lives in Vegas and is eagerly anticipating my move when/if it occurs. She was feeling pretty bad during my birthday, so I was checking to make sure that she was okay and feeling better…because that's what I do. Anyway, shortly after sending her a text message, my phone rings…and I notice that it's a call from Vegas. Awesome, Bubbles is calling to talk in person. Now, a little back-story. Because we're cool cats who call each other in a workplace environment a lot, we tend to use our very proper, overly kind, high-pitched phone voices when we call each other at work (otherwise our sultry voices sound like we're trying to undress you over the phone…and that gets awkward at work). Also, we both liked "Cable Guy" starring Jim Carrey…and particularly the scene where he sings "The Girl from Ipanema" for hold music. I know, we're dorks…but we're sexy...and that's the back-story. So in comes the call.

$teve: "What's up?"
Female Voice: "Good afternoon, is this Mr. $teve?"
$teve: "Just a moment please. Na da dada dada dadadada… (that's my hold music) Hello?"
Female Voice: "Ugh…hello? Mr. $teve?"
$teve: "Yes? Is this…Bubbles?"
Female Voice: "Ugh…no. This is (HR director) from (future employer in Vegas). I'm sorry…was that…you doing the hold music?"
$teve: "OH!!! Ugh…yes, that was me. I apologize. I thought that you were my friend calling from Vegas. We have these inside jokes and…my apologies. I…really wasn't expecting a call…such as yours on a Sunday afternoon."
Female Voice: "Oh that's okay. It was just…weird."
$teve: "I can understand that. Anyway, how can I be of assistance?"

So this was how my first interview for the position in Vegas started. After that, it was pretty standard. They asked me why I'd be good for the company and what I was expecting from the position and what kind of schedule I was interested in and all the usual stuff. I think that I did fairly well for being caught off-guard…and being the world's biggest dumbass for the first thirty seconds. To be honest though, she's the one that called me on a Sunday afternoon though. Anyway, after that, I had to call Bubbles to let her know…and it made her day. As it did for the Wingmans, JL Clyde, Ashley, and my mom…who all called within the hour when I was thinking to myself, "Holy crap! They're not going to call back. She probably thinks I'm retarded or something. Oh well. Her loss." So yeah, I'll keep you posted on progress with that.

This morning at work was quite hectic, because we were moving into our new building and getting the computer set up and getting coworkers use to the new surroundings. Busy busy busy…but we got it handled. Other than that, not much going on really. Get off around five today…and I'm going to have some fun…or at least watch some great basketball. I love the first round of the playoffs. GO SPURS!!! Also, happy birthday to my now 14-year old cousins K & T. I still remember babysitting you little brats…but now you're growing up into big brat squeally teenagers. Too bad. Anyway, here's a quiz things that I was sent through MySpace by one of my favorite felons and party throwers, Bren.

FIRSTS

1. Who was your FIRST prom date?
Rebekah - We were on the Academic Olympiad team together. The cork went unpopped.

2. Do you still talk to your FIRST love?
Haven't heard from her in over a year now

3. What was your FIRST alcoholic drink?
My dad let me sip his beer when I was three years old…and I spit it back all over him. "YUCKY!!!" Didn't drink again until I was 18. Free lesson for all you parents out there. No need to thank me, just pay it forward.

4. What was your FIRST job?
Dishwasher at Freeway Café in Ogden - Lasted four days…then I quit

5. What was your FIRST car?
Firecracker red '85 Chevrolet Camaro with 2.8L V6 5-speed engine - Her name is Carmen

6. Who was the FIRST person to text you today?
Ashley, my sister-in-law sending me a racist joke. Just kiddin', she was reminding me that it was K & T's birthdays, like I forgot or something.

7. Who is the FIRST person you thought of this morning?
It doesn't matter. She wasn't really there.

8. Who was your FIRST grade teacher?
Mrs. V - She only taught for two years…but her husband was my Calculus teacher a decade later…and he creeped me out by showing me my 1st grade picture (complete with black & yellow striped dress shirt…love the 80's) when I was a senior in high school. "Where the hell did you get that?" "Who was your 1st grade teacher?" "Mrs. V…you're bangin' Mrs. V???" "I would hope so. She's my wife." Yeah, I'm an idiot. They had the same last name…but it never clicked until that point.

9. Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane?
DISNEYLAND!!! We won a sweepstakes thing at Mervyn's and we had a talking car and everything. It was awesome.

10. Who was your FIRST best friend and are you still friends?
A neighbor kid named Steve when I lived in Ogden…but I haven't seen him since we moved away twenty years ago.

11. What was your FIRST sport played?
I was a soccer goalie…and the best…but then I moved to basketball…and am still the best.

12. Where was your FIRST sleep over?
Hell if I remember. Probably at Isaihia's a long, long time ago.

13. Who was the FIRST person you talked to today?
Myself - I know, it's schizo…but it gets me ready for the day. Deal with it.

14. Whose wedding were you in the FIRST time?
I was the ring bearer in my Aunt Marie's wedding. I think I was six.

15. What was the FIRST thing you did this morning?
Your mom…and then I peed.

16. What was the FIRST concert you ever went to?
The first one I remember going to was Billy Joel

17. FIRST tattoo or piercing?
TBD

18. FIRST foreign country you went to?
We did a road trip when I was about eight that took us briefly through Calgary. Don't recall much. After that, it was my 5-week European vacation when I was eighteen.

19. What was your FIRST run in with the law?
My first car was a Camaro. I got speeding tickets for being parked. F**k the police!!!

20. When was your FIRST detention?
About 5th or 6th grade, we got a new principal…who had Reese's Peanut Butter Cups on his desk…so I made it my purpose to be sent there every just about every day (but always after my school work was done). After a while, he asked me straight up, "Do you just get in trouble to get some peanut butter cups?" "Yeah…and it's kinda fun." "Well, tell you what. If you wanna just come in and say howdy or something, instead of getting in trouble. Feel free to stop by & have a peanut butter cup. Then you won't have to stand up in class and tell your teacher to shut up to get sent here." "Okay. Sounds good."

21. What was the FIRST state you lived in?
Utah

22. Who was the FIRST person to break your heart?
My dad - "You know E.T. isn't real, right?"

23. Who was your FIRST roommate?
Jamie, a military brat from Ras Tanuri. Though it sounds like a bad ass Jamaican hideout…it's actually in Saudi Arabia. He was cool…but moved out a few months later…and was replaced by Hung Nhut Nguyen (not joking, the kid's name was Hung Nhut) a Korean student who made the most delicious and smelly dinner.

24. Where did you go on your FIRST limo ride?
The Ritz-Carlton, Central Park hooked me up with a ride to the airport. I was twenty-two, I think.

25. Who will be the FIRST to repost this?
I have no idea…but only the cool cats will leave comments.

That'll do it. Big thanks to Cat for bringing me in a birthday cake today at work!!! I'd show you a picture...but I don't have my camera handy...and it's already half eaten. It was a Pixar's "Cars" theme with $teve "Lightning" McQueen on it. Ch-kow!!! Ch-kow!!! Have a great day everybody!!!