This was a superfun weekend!!! So get ready to hear about it...because I simply have nothing better to do. Well, after blogging Thursday morning, I had the intentions of stopping by work to pick up my paycheck, say hi to some people, and get out so that I could do some Christmas shopping before heading to my brother's. Instead, I stopped by work, picked up my check, then was invited to a little Christmas party where they served grilled cheese sandwiches, holiday goodies, and meet some of the newer coworkers via internet conference. So I scratched the shopping and went to hang with my brother and best friend since the 2nd grade, Isaihia.
Along the drive down there, I got a message from one of my sister-in-law's school friend (who I've never even been introduced to before) and apparently, she (Mel) was screening prospects for another friend (JoJo)...who my sister-in-law wanted to me to meet. Wow, it was the 7th grade all over again...only slightly crazier. "So...what's your baggage?" "Excuse me? I don't have baggage little lady. I've got luggage...ready to go around the world on a whim...but I am a bit of a smartass." "Do you shave your head?" "No." "Why not?" "Because my scalp is less than desirable...and I like my hair." "You should totally shave your head. JoJo likes shaved heads." "Good for her. I like redheads with tig bitties." "(Laughter, then to somebody else) This guy's an asshole. He says he wants you to be a redhead." "That's not what I said and you know it...now are you gonna put her on the phone or what?" Phone hangs up...disconnected service, I'm sure.
The phone rings again. "Hi, is this JoJo?" "No, this is Mel." "Could you do me a favor? Cut out the middle man and let me get straight to the source...unless she's in surgery or something, of course." "(Handed over) Hello?" "Hi, JoJo?" "Yeah, sorry about my friend Mel...she's kind of a bitch." "Agreed. Hey, so...how's it going?" "You wanna meet up tomorrow sometime?" "Well, sure. Why not?" So that was that...for now. Frankly, I'm kinda getting tired of calls from my sister's crazy friends...but there's more on this later.
The three of us (Isaihia, Kiel, & myself) played Rock Band for a while...like all day...because time flies when you're having fun...and watching Kairi. I didn't feel the least bit sorry...even when it started snowing horribly and getting icy so that I couldn't go hang with my mom. I slept on the sofa bed...around 3 AM because that's how my brother rolls. My other 'brother' and Isaihia's brother Spitso stopped by to play too...and ask if we could run security for him at a show Friday night. We agreed.
Congratulations to the U!!! - The University of Utah football team beat Navy in the Poinsettia Bowl. That's all that's really important. Read the article for details.
Friday - I was awoken around 10 AM by Mel. "So...are you coming to meet us at noon?" "You still haven't told me where." "Ash can bring you." "Ugh...okay, Ash is at school or work or something though. Do you have any idea where you're at? Is it possible to give me directions...or perhaps some kind of medication to get to where you are?" "What? No, it's...it's hard to explain...I ugh..." "(God damn public school)" "Get Ash to bring you. I'll tell her where." "Does she speak your native tongue or something?" By this point, I was just getting fed up with this stuff...especially when JoJo was nowhere to be heard...then she got on the phone, "Hi, are my friends making you do this?" "Yes, they are holding a gun to my head and demanding that I meet you. Come on now, this is ridiculous. Are they making you meet me? If so, all you gotta say is no and we can forget this ever happened." She laughed handing the phone back and I heard her say, "He's not an asshole. You're just a bitch." Awesome. Long, stupid text conversation later (oh yeah, text after that)...we never met and I'm pretty sure that we're both better off.
During the day, more hanging with Kiel and now, both nieces Kelaudri & Kairi. Those girls are just so damn cute...but by the time 9 PM rolled around, it was time to run security for our boy Spitso at Kamikaze's in Ogden. For those of you who have never been there, all you need to know...is that it's a dive...that used to be a church. Awesome, right? Nyeh, it's okay...but he just plays there because of the music. We showed up about two hours before showtime...and fifteen minutes before Spitso...so the doorperson made us pay five bucks. "We're security for the performers though. We were informed that we didn't have to pay cover...because we're doing our jobs. Is this not the case?" "I don't know. The guy you'd need to talk to just stepped out."We paid the cover...and took a seat until Spitso got there. Honestly, the three of us are kind of an imposing image...because Isaihia's an army officer...and my brother & I are massive...but honestly, we could protect him...even without experience. Back on point though, I was thirsty. "Could I get a water?" Bottle is laid on the counter, "Four bucks." "I'm security for the performers. Is there a complimentary alternative?" "Nope." "Yet you have a six buck pitcher of Bud Light? You know what...gimme a pitcher of Bud Light. Here in Utah it's basically just bad water anyway." We shared about half a pitcher before Spitso showed up. Apparently, 'the guy' we needed to speak with showed up and said that we couldn't run security because we were drinking. "Excuse me, you're not going to allow us to do security...for the ten people here in the bar...because a pitcher of beer is cheaper than a bottle of water? Believe me, my associates and I are in top form." "I can't give you your cover back...because legally you're intoxicated." "Do you have a breathalyzer? Would you like to quiz me or something?" "It doesn't matter. It's too late." "Well, let it be known...that IF something happens to my brother here, that it will be taken care of. On that note, I think that I'm going to finish my drink. Have a great night, Dick." Honestly, I didn't know his name...but I thought it was a good guess.
Needless to say, nothing happened...except a great performance, a few frosty watered down beverages, and a lot of fun with the brothers. The follow-up act, Demise, wasn't nearly as good...but they were okay. Great beats...but no stage presence. We drove him and slept shortly after...still frosty outside. Damn winter.
Saturday - This morning, I was awoken by my Aunt Pat calling...and then hanging up when I answered. I didn't return the call. Still haven't heard from her. Must not have been important. During the day, I watched the nieces again and we had a great time. Kelaudri seems to really like me and likes to snuggle with me and stuff. Kairi does too...but not as profusely as Kelaudri. Great kids though. I actually remember having Kairi lay her head down on my chest with her thumb in her mouth...and thinking to myself, "Man, what would it be like to have one of these of my own?" Then she farted...well, more than a fart...and the moment was lost.
Tonight was my mom's family's Christmas party...and I may have mentioned this before...but my mom is one of 17 children...and I am one of sixty-something grandchildren...and there's a few dozen great-grandchildren...oh yeah...and a lot of the children and grandchildren have spouses...so it was a full house. My brother couldn't make it because of work (gasp) but I stepped in and played the role or helping to transport the kids. I also helped my mom set everything up...because it's what I do when my mom volunteers to do stuff like this...I do the legwork. It rocks. Here are some pictures of the party...
A small sampling of the early partygoers...
The Christmas Tree and some who
weren't running around and screaming...
Standing room only performance of the Nativity Story
Starring Baby Jesus, Joe, Mary, angels, and the
three fairly-intelligent men among others...
Some say it's sacreligious...
Some say it's cute...
I think Jesus is a little ill...maybe it was the myrrh.
Extreme Musical Chairs
The Finals - I think the little kids are in trouble
"Aw, the little girl won? Shenanigans!!!"
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