The Mystery of the Mind

Has anybody out there taken an Intro to Psychology or Intro to Philosophy class? Or possibly even be a Philosophy major (unemployed)? For those of you who answered yes (or even those who answered no or not at all), have you ever questioned your own existence? Have you ever watched the Matrix or read "The Brain in the Vat" or any other philosophical paper about how we know the world only through our perceptions of it? Reading some of these papers (and it helps to chase it with mind-altering concoctions) can change your perception of your own existence, sensations, & everything else. What if I'm just a random brain in a jar making my own universe...or some Sim in an artificial universe in a PS5 video game? Our minds take in electronic impulses & process them into a way that we interpret. Am I really a tall guy with chiseled good looks & a stunning package...or is that just what I see when I look in the mirror? For those of you that say it's merely delusion...f**k you, it's my reality. My point is to always keep your mind open to the possibilities...and no, I don't smoke pot.

Dreams - I try to keep a pretty level head about my existence...and whenever I'm in doubt, I'll ask somebody...and grab my own crotch for reassurance. Yup, I'm still here. Whew, that was close. The main thing that really keeps me with an open mind though...is dreams. Now, I'm not sure of the whole real significance about dreaming in color & being able to read & understand speech and all of that stuff in dreams, but most of mine are pretty vivid & realistic. The really weird thing is that while I'm having them, most of them are pretty mundane & seem uneventful at the time. However, later on (the time varies) I'll find myself seeing something new or meeting somebody new that I recall from these dreams (deja vu?) and that always strikes me as odd. Granted, there are a lot of people with similar features out there (especially in Utah) but it's the features & a feeling or something that I get around them that really recalls the dream (not necessarily arousal...but it has happened). Sometimes the new people turn out to be great friends (and occassionally lovers) and other times they turn out to be pretty casual acquaintances. The new places are usually breathtakingly beautiful...but not necessarily. However, the fact that I recall them from the dream still makes me wonder.

Another thing that makes me wonder is when I have a dream now (whether wet or scary...which can also be wet) whether or not it may come true in the future. Will I have an incredible, sexually experimental weekend on the moon with a woman resembling Jessica Alba (that was a good one)? Will I cut an intruder down with a broadsword as he tries to break my brother's house with his wife & child inside? I hope not...but be warned, he's got swords all over that place so don't even try. In a creative writing class, we were supposed to write about a dream that we had over the weekend...and this is one that I wrote down. Any psychology majors out there, please feel free to let me know what it means.

My Weird Dream (This was a real one!)

As the five of us were sitting in the lobby making sandwiches, I was mesmerized by the size of the lounge area. What was that rumbling noise? I looked around to see a skinny gentleman slowly stepping away from an espresso machine and yelling, “Hit the deck!” KABOOM!!! The machine exploded and everybody in the hotel freaked and ran for the exits. I was amazed at how all of them reacted, but then again everybody’s been jumpier lately (written in October 2001). Oh well, now it’s time to see what this city has to offer me.

Of all the things we could do on a vacation, everybody else wants to see that new movie starring Kurt Russell and a pink dinosaur with green polka dots. I just don’t get it. Anyway, the movie sucked. I saw the new Disneyland Casino with the backdrop of the gorgeous Rocky Mountains in this small town setting and I felt so lucky to be here. “Hey everybody, let’s go see that!” as I pointed to the casino standing like the castle Neuschwanstein...only smaller.

As we approached the entrance, the annoying blonde-haired man of the group (I don’t quite recall his name) said, “I can’t believe you’re taking us to a museum.” What? This is a casino, nothing could be further away from a museum than that. Forget it, I walked in and sat at a blackjack table with an elderly woman and the girl-next-door. The dealer handed me a card face down and the Jack of Spades. What was that rumbling noise again? The carousel shook violently as parents grasped their children and headed for the exits again. But this time, there was no explosion. A mob of onlookers started to scream and I wondered what the commotion was, so I ran outside. A black rain flew from the third story of the casino, perhaps it was oil but I didn’t care to find out. “Okay everybody, let’s go next door.”

Next door was the NBA Store and everybody knows that I love my basketball. An elderly lady stood by the cashier’s desk. I couldn’t tell if she was just really cold, had Parkinson’s Disease, or just had a stuttering problem but eventually I made a sentence out of it, "Do you need help with anything, sweetie?" I replied, “No, I’m just looking around? Thank you.”
That’s a rather odd jersey, I’ve followed basketball and the history of it since I was six years old but there was a rather new Utah Jazz jersey with the name June on back and the number 5. Had the Jazz drafted this person and I wasn’t paying attention? Then my bedside alarm goes off.

Okay everybody...diagnose the Doctor. Be brutal!!! Just a thought...but can you be insane if you know it? Where's the border for insanity? Is it throwing fecal matter? Is it enjoying the music of Hilary Duff? Is it thinking that the Cleveland Cavaliers will win the next four games of the NBA Finals? Tell me...where's the line?